There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
