Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
It's like God shit irony all over that family
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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