Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it. http://tfl.nu/p2ch
  Replies (4) Good night (2724) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell. http://tfl.nu/ey83
  Replies (24) Good night (3496) Bad night (2709)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass. http://tfl.nu/mex7
  Replies (12) Good night (9663) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once http://tfl.nu/6yr8
  Replies (9) Good night (4144) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk http://tfl.nu/17n5
  Replies (7) Good night (1252) Bad night (3825)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody http://tfl.nu/wrf2
  Replies (12) Good night (2663) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES? http://tfl.nu/cu3x
  Replies (8) Good night (2093) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids. http://tfl.nu/kj6p
  Replies (11) Good night (2696) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side http://tfl.nu/k88p
  Replies (12) Good night (2062) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair http://tfl.nu/q3gk
  Replies (6) Good night (713) Bad night (1547)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle http://tfl.nu/8b8w
  Replies (6) Good night (1294) Bad night (541)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): He probably thinks you're playing hard to get. (248): Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone. http://tfl.nu/1zpx
  Replies (1) Good night (1399) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (343): View more from Ontario

  Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?

  (1-343): View more from Ontario

  Lol, last year was UNREAL

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (343): Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy? (1-343): Lol, last year was UNREAL http://tfl.nu/u4kx
  Replies (10) Good night (1270) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer. http://tfl.nu/mruj
  Replies (0) Good night (638) Bad night (227)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers http://tfl.nu/hsgj
  Replies (1) Good night (519) Bad night (273)

Randomize