I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
