she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
