Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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