you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize