If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
