But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
