I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
