so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
