i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize