I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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