Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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