We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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