Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
