i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Barsexuality is the new black.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
