I want to make a zoo with you.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
