That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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