I have demons in me.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
