Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Randomize
