i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
