I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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