you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
