My room smells like vodka and shame
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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