hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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