Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
