Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
