if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
