i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
How does one acquire holy water?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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