I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
