She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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