Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
