It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
dude. I can hear the air.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
