we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
