I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize