Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
