good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
