so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.