I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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