i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
