I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
