the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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