Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
