Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
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