She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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