Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
