whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
