Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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