i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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