so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
